Saturday, January 05, 2008

Forbidden words!

We can take or leave the annual list of banned words from the cousins at Lake Superior State. Around here, "webinar" is sort of like Bud Light: You can go ahead and pour my share back into the horse. We don't stock it or serve it, but if you show up with a six-pack to watch the game Sunday night, we're not going to make fun of you in public or anything.

What gets on the Forbidden Words list around here? Not the flavor-of-the-day things, or the ones that You Kids are going to Destroy The Language With if you don't turn those damn baseball caps around.* It's the ones that always seem to be hanging around the same crime scenes: "celebrates" with sports photos, "Up, Up and Away" with balloon photos, "at the scene" in cop stories, "saffron-colored robes"** in Southeast Asia stories. And, of course, the annoying Instant Epithets of the provincial press corps:
The show played so well in Iowa that Mike Huckabee, the bass-plucking former Southern Baptist preacher and Arkansas governor, decided to take it on the road. (Freep, Saturday 1A)
Meanwhile, Huckabee, the former Arkansas governor and bass-plucking Baptist preacher, rode a continuing wave of popularity in the state, wrenching away the lead long held by Republican Mitt Romney, a former Massachusetts governor and Bloomfield Hills native. (Freep, Friday 1A)

And any of the ones that have started to sound like datelines of their own:
WAR-TORN, Iraq (AP) --
DELEGATE-HEAVY, Calif. (AP) --
FIRST-IN-THE-NATION, Iowa (AP) --
OIL-RICH, Saudi Arabia (AP) --
And, of course, that hat trick -- hell, in deference to Lake Superior State, let's go ahead and call it a Perfect Storm -- of high-end dining terms in the lede story at right, from the Orlando Sentinel. Upscale eatery! Poshest restaurant! Swankiest restaurant! And that's before we get past the lede.

So -- ban new words? Nah. We have enough on our hands around here with the ones we already have.


* Sweet!
** I'm still trying to come up with a dateline for this one. Any suggestions there, Ridger?

2 Comments:

Blogger Andy Bechtel said...

How many people read that about Huckabee and ask, "Honey, why is this man fingering a fish? And why does the paper keep mentioning it?"

9:05 AM, January 07, 2008  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm glad I'm not alone--glad I'm not alone in thinking "I can't be bothered banning current slang like 'sweet'" and in thinking, "what's up w/ that fish, and how DO you pluck a bass anyway? On the gills?"

1:22 PM, January 07, 2008  

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