Son of "that's what"
That's how long it took someone to drive by three Pleasant Hill houses Monday morning and fire one or more bullets before driving away. Two people were struck and suffered non life-threatening injuries. More could easily have been wounded or worse, Pleasant Hill police said.
Certainly seems to have taken his sweet time about things, didn't he? (Assuming he was a he
and there was only one of him, I mean.) Unless you wait for the Google map to explain that the houses aren't next to each other or anything, except that makes the "one or more bullets" sound even more jargon-like -- and makes you wonder why the story's cautious enough to say "in the NNN block of ..." when the map gives exact addresses. But it takes your eye off the third graf, which begins "One is Local Teen" without letting on which of the earlier categories he might be one of. And then there's the caption with the mug, which see, but that's piling on.
Sometimes it'd be nice if there was less writing and more reading -- say, of the copy that's about to leave your hands -- at America's Newspapers.
(Thanks to longtime reader Sam for the share.)
Labels: War on Editing