Speak for yourself

Q: Why do mean-spirited old editors insist on crushing the souls of the vibrant young spirits who write for the modern press?
A: Because they can!

No, not really. It's because no matter how often the message is shared, somebody has always just stepped out for coffee. Christmas is going to be right on time this year, no matter how tempted you are to say otherwise. And no, we do not scream for ice cream.

I don't know if there's a correlation between the frequency of Forbidden Ledes and the rise of editing hubs, but it's worth looking at. Maybe the howls of pain and gales of derisive laughter from within your own newsroom were enough to break youngsters of these habits.

Perhaps one of our technologically advanced friends could come up with an alternative solution? An app that throws a dictionary across the room toward the workstation at which a "there's an app for that" lede has been entered?