When zombies write travel stories

Swell? I'll say! Restaurants spiffy too! And convenience of public transit just out of this world!

Sorry, just trying to take my mind off wondering how long it took some fair 'n' balanced mind to come up with "Mr. Brown Goes to Washington" and whether anyone, for any brief moment, thought better of it. A reminder to you real newspapers out there that might be pondering the same centerpiece: Don't.